I am the Lord of the Office, so sayeth this certificate from the Scottish Worldeth Wide Webbeth!

How much longer is this going to go on?

For a, um. A fortnight!

Do you even know how long a fortnight is?

Um, forsooth.... Uh, something-pudding-or-other...

You know, there's no shame in just going back to regular Mortimer.

Oh thank goodness, I was completely out of material.